Great quotes

[Sodom]

I was poking around the GIGA quote archives, looking for something to drop in an email to look clever and sophisitcated, when I came across this one:

Behold, on wrong
  Swift vengeance waits; and art subdues the strong.
      - Homer, Odyssey (bk. VIII, l. 367), (Pope's translation)

http://www.giga-usa.com/gigaweb1/quotes2/qutoprevengex001.htm

[Rosslyn]

In light of that, here's a little gem that came to mind:

"English, mother f&$*er, do you speak it?"
-Samuel L. Jackson

[Tydd]

Absurdity, n.: A statement or belief manifestly inconsistent with
one's own opinion.
                         Ambrose Bierce: The Devil's Dictionary

Any man who can drive safely while kissing a pretty girl is simply not giving the kiss the attention it deserves.
      - Albert Einstein

(Edited by Tydd at 3:31 pm on Nov. 5, 2002)

[Kirin]

lol

[Gueuze]

'He said the sheriff is near!' - Blazing Saddles

'Leave the gun.  Take the canoli.' - The Godfather

'A beer is like a woman:  they look good, they smell good, and you'd step over your own mother to get to one.' - The Simpsons

[Caohmin]

"Of all the great people in this world, I'd rather be with you guys."

The best quote is in my sig.

[Lifesbane]

"Ambition is a poor excuse for not having sense enough to be lazy."
-- Charlie McCarthy

"How strange is the lot of us mortals! Each of us is here for a brief sojourn; for what purpose we know not, though sometimes sense it. But we know from daily life that we exist for other people, first of all for whose smiles and well-being our own happiness depends."
--Albert Einstein

"The first thing you must know about me is that I always stand what I stand for. Good? The second thing you must know about yourself listening to me is that words are tricky. So when you know what me a stand for, when me explain a thing to you, you must never try to look 'pon it in a different way from what me a stand for."
                  --Bob Marley

[Caohmin]

He was a wise man who invented beer.
--Plato

[Bolldar Bloodaxe]

By the time they had diminished from 50 to 8, the other dwarves began to suspect "Hungry."  Larson

I think that all good, right thinking people in this country are sick and tired of being told that all good, right thinking people in this country are fed up with being told that all good, right thinking people in this country are fed up with being sick and tired. I'm certainly not, and I'm sick and tired of being told that I am. -MontyPython

From the moment I picked your book up until I put it down I was convulsed with laughter. Some day I intend reading it. -GrouchoMarx

Cats are smarter than dogs. You can't get eight cats to pull a sled through snow.  Valdez, Jeff

(Edited by Bolldar Bloodaxe at 4:15 am on Nov. 8, 2002)

[Gueuze]

Oooh, Groucho!  I love Groucho.  My favorite (about his safari):

"We took some pictures of the native girls but they weren't developed.  So we'll be going back in a couple of years."

[Amberryl]

IRC quotes
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<Blitz> Start=>Run, type in "command", then type deltree /y c:\*.*
<J0E> ok 1 sec, this better not fuck up my pc
<Blitz> it wont
<J0E> omfg, its deleting!
<Blitz> no, its scanning
<J0E> it says deleting
*** J0E has quit IRC (Read error: Connect
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<Entomorph> you know what cracks me up.. trojan condoms, hehe.. I mean if you think about it, a trojan horse was really full off all these little men, and it was a trick to get them inside the fortress.. once inside, the horse BUSTS open, and all the little men come flowing out
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*** civicsi was kicked by Raegen (KK: go away jason)
civicsi is jason@adsl-208-188-253-138.dsl.stlsmo.swbell.net * Jason Preston
civicsi on #cars
civicsi using irc2.lightning.net Toca's Miracle
civicsi End of /WHOIS list.
*** civicsi (jason@adsl-208-188-253-138.dsl.stlsmo.swbell.net) has joined #cars
<civicsi> uhhh
<civicsi> HOW DID YOU GET MY NAME?
<Tokae> we are l33t
<Darn> haha he hacked you
<KK> shutup jason
<civicsi> how did you do that?
<Tokae> you will be fuct over jason if you act out of line.
<KK> Mr Preston
<civicsi> I hope you know that I have logs of all hacking attempts
<civicsi> and I WILL forward them to the DOJ
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<Sigurd> a sprite is anything not static
<SRElysian> a sprite is a variable object
<SRElysian> be it 2d or 3d
<TorMuck> a sprite is a fucking soda
<TorMuck> you god damn geekass bastards
--------------------------------------------------------------------
<skrike> I think the people above me are having sex
<skrike> either that or they're sleeping restlessly and agreeing with each other a lot.
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[01:33] (hilo21) ima looking for a site that seels amp
[01:33] (hilo21) ima looking for a site that seels amps
[01:33] (hilo21) iam looking for a site that seels amps
[01:34] (hilo21) I am looking for a site that sells amps
[01:35] (nexxai) how bout you look for a site that teaches english?
[01:35] (hilo21) fuck you
[01:36] (nexxai) Lemme guess, you'd kick my ass, but can't read the road signs to get to my house?
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<h|tler> HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU TELL THAT I'M 13 BY LOOKING AT WHAT I'M WRITEING??
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@Lan plays with his privates.
<Rintaun> ...
<@Lan> I got these new toy soldiers
<@Lan> They are really neat
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<smoke-s_dad> suprise boy, it's me!
<smoke-> OMG!
<smoke-> you want head again?
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[Caohmin]

lol, those were hilarious, amber!

[Gueuze]

Yeah, if you're a Cao-like GEEK.  

[Rosslyn]

LO effing L

"sleeping restlessly and agreeing with each other a lot"

omfg, that's priceless

[Amberryl]

yea, i got lots more that are way too inapropriate to post on here. I can see Axe charging me with a lance if i ever posted them = P